Tag Archives: fame

Your NEW Epic Rap Star Name

So, the other night, it occurred to me that I told you the formula for a 2012 epic rap song, but I failed to even point you in some sort of direction as to what kind of rap star name you’d have. Like, HELLO?!? What was I thinking?┬áThe rap star name itself is almost as important as your song. It creates your entire image!

Believe me, I could NOT sleep for the rest of the night. I was tossing and turning thinking of pointers for you. Luckily, there are a couple directions you can go in with this:

1. Become an animal. Pitbull, Snoop Dogg (lion) and Tyga are all solid examples of this. This is becoming a tad cliche though, so watch out. Remember Lil Bow Wow? Kid’s a joke. Now he wants to be called “Bow Wow.” Pffft, OK. Like I’m gonna remember to do that. Whatever, dude.

2. Common places or brand names misspelled. Eminem, Timbaland, Flo Rida fall under this category. Remember Salt n Pepa? So do I because their rap star names rock. If you’re lazy and don’t want to put too much time into creating your rapper name, you can have it done in minutes if you go this route. Pepsi, McDonalds, West Virginia, iPod and Saint Louis all haven’t been used yet so go to town.


3. Use “lil,” “Dr.” or “young” to preface something. Personally, I’d go with “Dr.” here. Don’t worry, you don’t need your doctorate or anything… It’s not like people are checking. It’s the best option because it gives you more cred and no one will listen to what you say if they don’t trust you.


4. Create a name outside of the English language. Try using one to two letters and a dash like Ne-Yo or Jay-Z. Didn’t Prince become a symbol for a while? I mean, he’s not a rap star, but it certainly grabbed our attention, amirite? Or why not just create a new word like Akon, JaRule or Shwayze did?


5. If all else fails use your real name. You can spice it up. Jason DeRulo sings his name. Sammy Adams was named after a domestic beer so he doesn’t even have to do anything. Maybe do what Nicki Minaj does- some people call her Nicki and others call her Roman like Kanye West, who sometimes goes by ‘Nye.

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Sexiest Man Alive

Bradley Cooper was just named People’s Sexiest Man Alive and like every prior sexiest man ever, he’s being all shy about it by modestly claiming that he’s not and saying he’s still not comfortable with the whole “heartthrob” title.

This makes me think that everyone in Hollywood either believes we “normal-folk” are stupid enough to assume they don’t have giant egos or are unfamiliar with the general rule that if you’re in movies then you’re attractive. C’mon now. Even the “homely best friend” in romantic comedies is hotter than most of us.

What’s also puzzling about the “Sexiest Man (or woman)” title is that, unless the deemed-sexiest from last year died or somehow drastically altered his appearance, he should still hold the title, right? I mean, Bradley Cooper was alive and looked about the same this time last year, so why wasn’t he “sexiest” then? What did he do over the course of one year to make himself #1? What did #1 from last year do to dethrone himself of that coveted title?

Also, why doesn’t People magazine scour the entire earth for the REAL sexiest man? To me, that’s a bearded Alaskan woodsman who chops entire piles of wood, fist-fights bears and smells of woodchips, not some theatre geek who just happened to get lucky by making it big in Hollywood.

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